About last night, our return to group gatherings.
Last night was amazing. Seven men, myself included, had the opportunity to let it all hang out, let what we could melt away, and find some deeply healing relaxation in our shared touch.
Not long ago, I stepped away from hosting my men's group for a bit—just to make some space to think. I’d been feeling a bit disconnected from the energy of group work, so I took some time to rest and let things settle.
After about a month of contemplation, I started to miss so much about the group. So I fired up the ideas, reinvigorated the website, jumped back into my blog posts, and reached out to the men who had shown up and shared their thoughts with me during my time away.
One reason I became dissatisfied with the dynamic of INTOUCHMEN was a lack of input, new ideas, and community from the community itself. I realized that, as captain of the ship, I was putting in the work without feedback. So I looked closely at that—and realized I was the key to my dilemma.
Hosting groups is no simple task. Keeping motivation alive—for people outside of oneself—is a huge challenge in this wild and often messy world we all find ourselves in. With the feedback I received, I realized what I needed to do: speak up, share my frustration with the men, and build a better INTOUCHMEN together.
Last night we gathered again and began in a wonderful naked circle. I asked three questions:
What did you miss about the touch we share at group?
What type of touch would you most enjoy receiving this evening?
What type of touch do you wish to give?
The answers were amazing—real, vulnerable, honest, eye-opening, and appreciated more than I can express in a blog post.
Touch is huge! It starts with two or more—if you’re lucky (come to group)—human beings getting close and really being with one another. That feeling lasts and travels with us as we make our way back into our own individual lives.
Nights like this are why I return to host, to share, and to be a part of this wild, wonderful experiment that is INTOUCHMEN. We don’t always have the answers, and sometimes we need to step away to remember why we show up in the first place. But when we gather, drop our guards, and open up to honest connection, magic happens.
Here’s to more circles, more laughter, and more of the realness that brings us together. Can’t wait for the next one!
